Get thee to a museum!

Get thee to a piano lesson!

Stop to smell the roses. Literally.

Surround yourself with flowers, music, beauty, and moments of awe.

They may be nourishing us in ways science is only beginning to understand.

Earlier this year, I reported a story on the recent science of How Beauty Changes the Beholder. Researchers shared how aesthetic experiences affect attention, emotion, and the sense of self — that beauty is far from just decorative. It can widen perspective, deepen connection, and help pull us out of the narrow churn of our own thoughts.

Now, a striking new study suggests those effects may reach even further: art and cultural engagement may actually help us age more slowly.

In a culture obsessed with supplements, optimization routines, and longevity hacks, the findings feel both surprisingly reassuring and - well, deeply human. Health may be shaped by far more than diet, exercise, and biomarkers alone. The arts, culture, and the humanities matter. Indeed, they are increasingly proving to be a key ingredient for a long, happy, and meaningful life.

Early humans and Neanderthals, rendering their prehistoric art as early as 70,000 to 40,000 years ago, may have been onto something well before we, modern humans, started worrying about AI sucking the creative life and soul out of us.

The study, “Does leisure activity matter for epigenetic aging? Analyses of arts engagement and physical activity in the UK Household Longitudinal Study,” published this month in the journal Innovation in Aging, analyzed data from more than 3,500 adults in the United Kingdom and found that people who regularly engaged in arts and cultural activities showed slower biological aging — in some cases with effects comparable to physical activity.

The researchers examined participation in activities ranging from visiting museums and concerts to singing, dancing, painting, and other forms of creative expression. Using multiple “epigenetic clocks” — tools that measure biological aging through chemical changes linked to DNA over time — they found that people who engaged with the arts more frequently appeared to age more slowly at the biological level.

The findings were especially strong among adults over 40.

Importantly, the benefits appeared across both creators and observers: not only people making art, but people attending concerts, visiting museums, or participating in cultural life.

That distinction matters.

Because it suggests that beauty and creativity may nourish us not only through achievement or productivity, but through attention, emotion, meaning, and connection.

In my Templeton Ideas story “How Beauty Changes the Beholder,” I interviewed psychologists and neuroscientists studying how beauty affects the brain and perception. Researchers like University of Cambridge psychologist Simone Schnall found that engaging deeply with beauty can help people psychologically “zoom out” from the immediacy of their worries and shift into a more expansive mental state. Neuroscientist Edward Vessel’s work similarly suggests that aesthetic experiences can synchronize networks in the brain tied to memory, attention, emotion, and meaning-making.

Beauty, in other words, appears to do something to us.

Not superficially. Not ornamentally.

But cognitively, emotionally, and perhaps, increasingly, biologically.

The new aging study doesn’t prove that museums or music lessons are magic anti-aging interventions, and the researchers themselves are careful not to overstate causation. But the findings add to a growing body of research suggesting that art, beauty, awe, and meaningful cultural experiences may play a far more important role in wellbeing than we once realized.

And perhaps that feels intuitive.

Most people know, at least instinctively, that certain experiences change the texture of being alive.

A piece of music that dissolves stress.

A painting that stops us in our tracks.

Fresh flowers on the kitchen table.

A concert that reconnects us to other people.

A moment in nature so beautiful it briefly quiets the mind.

Should doctors prescribe leisure activities such as arts and cultural engagement [ACEng] the way they prescribe physical activity, maintaining a healthy body weight, a healthy diet, and avoiding excess alcohol, smoking, and stress — all to support not just a longer lifespan, but a healthier “healthspan”? When you ask people whether they’d actually want to live to 120 and beyond, most fear not just not having enough money to superage happily, but becoming miserably and debilitatingly sick and unhealthy as they age.

In the clickbait, zombie-scrolling era of fractured attention and chronic stress, beauty may function less as luxury and more as stress-reducing, rumination-interrupting, joy-giving, regulation.

At a moment when public conversation is dominated by artificial intelligence, productivity culture, and digital acceleration, there is something profoundly hopeful about this emerging research. It suggests that deeply human experiences still matter. Perhaps more than ever.

The arts are not frivolous.

Beauty is not optional.

The humanities matter. Culture matters.

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What forms of beauty, creativity, or cultural life make you feel most alive?

Music? Museums? Books? Nature? Dance? Film? Flowers?

It would be great to hear what nourishes you.

For years, I’ve found myself asking people a simple question—sometimes at dinner parties, sometimes to close loved ones: If you could have one superpower, what would it be?

Flying comes up often. So does invisibility.

My answer has always been the same: to speak every language on Earth. To be anywhere in the world—in an elevator, on a plane, in a crowded room—and understand everything being said, then respond calmly and fluently in a language not my own.

At some point, the thought expanded. What if I could understand animals, too?

It used to feel like pure fantasy.

But lately, science is showing that it may not be that far off.

We’re living in an era of everyday miracles where translation can happen in real time. Tools like Apple AirPods paired with translation apps, and emerging AI-powered glasses that display speech-to-text subtitles in your line of sight, are beginning to dissolve language barriers.

What once required years of study can now, at least in part, happen in real time.

And then there are the whales.

Building on decades of interspecies communication research, including apes learning to use sign language, scientists are continuing to explore how language might extend beyond our own species.

I recently reported on the A Night of Awe & Wonder event for Templeton Ideas, where National Geographic Explorer Dr. David Gruber spoke about his work leading Project CETI, the Cetacean Translation Initiative.

For years, his team has been recording and analyzing the rhythmic clicks of sperm whales, known as codas, using artificial intelligence to identify patterns, structures, even something resembling a phonetic system.

Little by little, they are beginning to decode how these animals communicate.

Not just sound, but meaning.

It’s an extraordinary idea, that we might one day bridge the gap between species.

The more you look, the more these once-impossible abilities are less like science fiction and more like early-stage reality.

There may not yet be a superhighway in the sky for flying cars…but the future increasingly seems to be here. The hope is that it’s not a dystopian one. One of my peeves is that when it comes to imagining the future - so much of it - in movies, television, art, music, and more - is dystopian. As if we’re being conditioned to accept—and even conditioning one another to accept—feeling comfortable with a horrible, unjust future. Does the future have to look like the TV show “The Boys”? What about showing us how to work together toward a utopian future? Let’s see that. A future where well-being and beauty are accessible to all is normalized, where our individual superpowers are used for good.

When I interviewed developmental biologist Michael Levin for the story “Human 3.0: Faster, Smarter, Stronger, Healthier…Immortal?”, he spoke about something he calls “freedom of embodiment.” If someone wants the ability to be augmented, for example, to breathe indefinitely underwater, or have eyes in the back of their head, many believe that should be their right.

Already, with scientific advancements, we aren’t limited by the form we’re born into. The line between biology and technology is becoming increasingly fluid. The era of the TV shows “The Six Million Dollar Man” and “The Bionic Woman” may indeed even now be surpassed.

What we think of as human may be far more flexible than we’ve ever believed.

Which brings me back to that original question.

If you could have one superpower, what would it be?

And more interestingly, why that one?

The desire to speak every language, I’ve come to realize, isn’t really about language at all. It’s about connection.

The desire for a superpower is often a desire to remove what separates us.

It’s about understanding. About being able to move through the world without the barriers that so often divide us.

Psychologists have long found that when people from different groups meaningfully interact—when they share space, goals, and conversation—prejudice tends to decrease. Familiarity softens fear. Understanding builds trust.

For now, most superpower abilities, as imagined in full, remain just out of reach.

But perhaps not for long.

Beyond the human need for power in the dystopian sense, how else might your superpower be used for good?

We’re already beginning to translate languages in real time. We’re beginning to listen to other species in new ways.

But your superpower may give us something else: a more just and beautiful world.

And maybe that’s the superpower to imagine and build, and what many have been working toward all along.

If you could have one superpower, what would it be—and why? I’d love to hear.

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Nearly 15 years ago, I wrote a feature for CNN with a headline that quietly pushed back on a cultural narrative: “Generation X Is Balanced and Happy.”

Far from the “slacker” moniker the media foisted upon us, we were working, building families, staying connected—and, by most measures, doing just fine.

I’ve spent much of my career reporting on how people live—how we work, love, adapt, and make meaning over time. Lately, I’ve found myself returning to a version of that same question.

This month, Gen X flew out of this world and back into the spotlight.

As images of the Artemis II crew, ages 47–50, began circulating online (the average age of the Apollo astronauts was 38.4), the former latchkey, Afterschool Specials– and Schoolhouse Rock!-watching, roam-free, make-your-own-open-face-cheese-on-bread-broiled-in-the-toaster-oven, figure-it-out, independent, adaptable, resilient—and yes, sometimes skeptical—generation took note.

Although Gen X is often cited as the forgotten generation—and, for many, never particularly interested in the spotlight—you can see in people’s posts that it feels good to see us in it, via the Artemis launch—steady, capable, getting it done.

Which raises a question:

So, Gen X—how are we doing now?

Fifteen years ago, the data told a clear story: we were employed, connected, family-oriented—and, on the whole, happy.

Today, the picture includes the complexities of modern life.

Are we okay in love?

The answer remains steady.

Divorce in the United States has followed a striking arc. It peaked around 1980—just as many Gen Xers were growing up—at 22.6 divorces per 1,000 married women. In the decades since, it has declined significantly, falling to 14.4 in 2023, according to the Pew Research Center.

Gen X, shaped by the instability of their parents’ generation, approached relationships more cautiously—and, in many cases, more durably.

Marriage is only one measure of love. Many Gen Xers came of age during a shift toward later marriage, cohabitation, and a broader definition of partnership—forms of stability that don’t always register in traditional statistics, even as they shape how people build and sustain their lives.

Are we okay financially?

Gen X is in its peak earning years—and, in many ways, at the center of the economy. Globally, we drive an estimated $15.2 trillion in consumer spending, making us the largest consumer cohort in the world, according to the World Economic Forum.

And yet, the underlying picture is far less secure. Surveys suggest that many Gen Xers believe they will need around $1.5 million to retire comfortably. Yet median retirement savings remain a fraction of that, often cited at around $40,000, a gap highlighted in recent Yahoo Finance reporting.

Part of the challenge is structural. Gen X is the first generation to navigate retirement largely without pensions—relying instead on 401(k)s, IRAs, and personal savings.

At the same time, Gen X is now a large part of what is known as The Sandwich Generation, as many are supporting both aging parents and children—often for longer than previous generations, as life expectancy increases. Financially, Gen X isn’t just earning; it’s also bearing the costs of multiple generations at once.

Which may explain the paradox: a generation with extraordinary economic influence, and a persistent sense that it may not be enough.

Are we overwhelmed?

In a word: often.

Gen X now sits at the center of what researchers, as referenced above, call the “sandwich generation,” balancing the demands of caring for aging parents while still supporting children. More than half of adults, even those in their 40s, are in this position, according to the Pew Research Center.

Midlife isn’t a plateau. It’s a point of compression for responsibility, time, and attention.

Are we still connected?

In many ways, yes.

The nature of connection has certainly evolved as technology has come to the fore. Yet Gen X may have the good fortune to understand how to maintain and develop genuine human-to-human, face-to-face relationships. Research shows that older adults are significantly less likely to report loneliness than younger generations, according to the Pew Research Center. It’s Gen Z that is reported to be the loneliest.

The independence once framed as detachment may have matured into something else: the ability to sustain connection without depending on constant proximity.

Are we holding up emotionally?

With all of this in mind, perhaps steadier than expected.

Many Americans continue to report being satisfied with their personal lives.

More broadly, well-being tends to increase with age, while younger generations report lower levels of well-being—placing Gen X, at this stage of life, in a relatively stable position.

If anything, the pattern points toward a kind of steadiness—less about extremes, and more about holding level over time.

Some have even suggested that Gen X may be doing more than holding steady: “Yes, Generation X is the coolest generation and (whisper it) the happiest too.”

A recent piece in Vogue makes a similar case: “What If Gen Xers Are Actually the Cool Ones?”

So, Gen X—how are we doing now?

The answer isn’t a single metric or even a few metrics. A happy, well-lived life is based on myriad factors. See my Q & A with Robert Waldinger, Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School: “Lessons From the World’s Longest Scientific Study of Happiness.”

Maybe it looks more like this:

A generation that grew up adapting to change, to uncertainty, to often being left to figure things out on our own—is now moving through midlife with that same instinct.

Not untouched by pressure. Not immune to strain.

But still here.
Still figuring it out.

And, in ways both visible and quiet, still getting it done and experiencing a great deal of joy along the way.

If you’re part of Gen X, I’d love to hear how you’re experiencing this moment—what feels true, what feels different, and what you’re noticing now.

And if you’re new here, you can subscribe to weekly stories on the science, culture, and lived experience of how we adapt, evolve, and find meaning over time.

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Springtime, the season of a symphony of flowers in a kaleidoscope of color, new growth budding in neon green, birds singing and darting, butterflies dancing.

The earth, alive. New life emerging. The light stretches, illuminating what was once dark. For many, this season of renewal symbolizes second chances and the hope that we, too, can begin again.

Research suggests that hope isn’t just something we feel in response to what’s happening around us, but something we can practice and build.

So how do we actually build hope—especially in uncertain or difficult moments?

Across psychology, philosophy, and behavioral science, hope is increasingly understood not as optimism or wishful thinking, but as a dynamic process—one that shapes how we see the future and how we move toward it. Hope can exist even when outcomes are unclear. It doesn’t require certainty.

Here are four ways research suggests we can strengthen it.

1. Hope Isn’t the Same as Optimism

We often assume hope starts with thinking positively.

But some of the most influential research suggests it begins earlier, with desire.

Psychologist C. R. Snyder, whose work helped define modern hope theory, described hope not just as belief but as a system grounded in motivation and direction. Before we can imagine our situation improving, we have to want it to.

A simple question can clarify that direction:

What do I want to move toward, even slightly, from where I am now?

Hope begins there.

2. Think in Pathways, Not Outcomes

Hope is not just about belief. It’s about seeing ways forward.

Snyder’s research shows that hope is built from two elements:

• a sense of agency (the will to act)

• and pathways (the ability to generate routes forward)

People with higher levels of hope aren’t necessarily more optimistic. They’re better at adapting. When one path closes, they look for another.

A possible action for becoming more hopeful: Instead of asking, ‘Will this work?’

Think: ‘What are three ways this could move forward?’

This shift from focusing on outcomes to focusing on pathways can expand what feels possible.

3. What You Pay Attention To Shapes What Feels Possible

Hope is influenced by where attention goes.

Research shows that people who maintain a hopeful orientation tend to be more resilient, more engaged, and better at recovering from setbacks.

Central to sustaining that hopeful orientation is where you’re giving your attention.

When our attention narrows toward constant negative input, comparison, or threats, our sense of possibility narrows with it. (How much news are you watching? How much zombie scrolling?)

When attention expands, so does what we’re able to imagine.

This is not about ignoring reality or living in a fairy-tale land. It’s about recognizing that attention is selective and consequential.

Practical shifts to consider include:

• Consider reducing one source of draining input

• Or replacing it with something that expands your perspective (nature, conversation, ideas, beauty)

4. Action Creates Momentum (and Builds Hope)

We often think hope comes first, followed by action.

But behavioral science suggests the relationship runs both ways.

Hope becomes real the moment it meets action.

Taking action—even small, imperfect action—can generate hope because it creates movement, feedback, and a sense of agency.

When I interviewed Ela Gandhi, granddaughter of the great Mahatma Gandhi, she emphasized that positive change didn’t have to begin with a grand gesture. It often began with neighbors working together locally.

Her perspective aligns closely with what research suggests: hope is not abstract. It takes shape through action. The small, tangible efforts that build momentum over time.

Be it your community or an individual, research suggests asking the question, ‘What is one thing I can do today that moves me slightly forward?’

Not a full reset. Just movement in the direction of what it is that you say you want.

The Practice of Hope

Hope is often portrayed as something that happens to us. A feeling that arrives when circumstances improve.

But across disciplines, it’s increasingly understood as something more active.

A way of engaging with uncertainty. A willingness to stay oriented toward possibility.
A practice shaped by attention, direction, and action.

It doesn’t require certainty, nor does it require everything to be going well.

It requires:

• a sense of direction

• an openness to possibility

• and a step forward, even when the outcome isn’t guaranteed

And sometimes, that’s enough to change what comes next.

Research & Sources

Research shows that hope is a crucial factor for increasing well-being. Below are sources where you can learn to be more hopeful.

• How to Feel More Hopeful
  https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/podcasts/item/how_to_feel_more_hopeful

• Snyder, C. R. (2002). Hope Theory: Rainbows in the Mind
  https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1207/S15327965PLI1304_01

• Eight Ways You Can Feel More Hopeful—Even in Dark Times
  https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/eight_ways_you_can_feel_more_hopeful_even_in_dark_times

• The Oxford Handbook of Hope – Introduction to the Science of Hope
  https://academic.oup.com/edited-volume/28108/chapter/212214221

• Hope and Well-Being
  https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2352250X23000039

If this resonated, I’d love to know what’s helping you stay open to possibility right now.

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Beauty is often treated as a luxury—something extra, something optional.

But what if it isn’t?

What if beauty is quietly shaping how we think, feel, and even who we’re becoming?

I grew up with a deep respect for beauty.

Not just in the obvious ways—my parents immersed me in art, music, museums, theatre, ballet, the symphony, even the opera—from a very early age.

But there was also a deep respect for the beauty of nature: the soft pinks and warm golds of sunrise shimmering over Lake Michigan’s silvery-blue water, the rhythmic, glowing pulse of lightning bugs on a midsummer night, the rich purples and reds of freshly picked berries, a monarch butterfly drifting through the air.

Beauty was something to notice. Something to be shown. Something to discover.

Beauty isn’t just something we notice. It changes how we see—and how we think.

It’s easy to recognize beauty in the dramatic—the cascading light of a Vermeer, the fluid grace of an Alvin Ailey dancer, the surging, life-filled power of Beethoven’s Symphony No.7 in A major op.92 - II, Allegretto, or any piece of music that connects you with the sublime—or simply lifts your mood.

But there is also beauty in quieter moments: the intricate lacework of a vintage handkerchief, the yellowed pages of a book inscribed with a generations-long-gone relative’s handwriting, or a sudden, unexpected rainbow—a brief, unexpected kind of magic—a portal into another dimension that appears on the wood floor while you’re doing the dishes.

What can seem superficial at a glance often reveals itself, on closer attention, to be something more meaningful.

And sometimes, beauty arrives in the smallest gestures.

My great-grandmother—well into her later years, even at 103—would still ask me to paint her nails. Her hand rested lightly in mine, her cool-to-the-touch skin soft against my own grade-school hand, as I brushed on the clear polish.

She was refined, lovely. The polish was almost invisible, just enough to catch the light, a faint shimmer along the curve of her nails.

And when I finished, we would pause—sharing a quiet smile at the understated loveliness of it. The way the light caught the gloss, a small shimmer of beauty just at her fingertips—still hers.

She would glance down at them, now and then, each time with the same quiet, unmistakable pleasure.

The moment wasn’t grand.

But it held a quiet, unmistakable beauty.

Only later did I begin to understand what was happening in moments like that.

We tend to think of beauty as something we admire.

But research suggests something more surprising: beauty may be actively shaping the mind itself.

For centuries, beauty was considered too subjective to study—too bound up in taste, culture, and feeling to measure. But a growing body of research suggests something more precise.

Beauty is not just decorative.

It is cognitive. It is biological.

And it quietly shapes how we experience the world.

It directs attention, regulates emotion, and helps organize meaning, quietly shaping how we experience the world from the inside out.

At Cambridge and other institutions, researchers are actively exploring the often-elusive impact of beauty on the beholder—how even brief encounters can shift attention, regulate emotion, and expand perspective.

Research suggests that consciously attending to beauty can create a mental distance from our immediate concerns, allowing us to step back and see more broadly.

Other work has found that when we are deeply moved by beauty, different systems in the brain begin working together—linking perception, memory, and meaning.

In those moments, what we see is not separate from who we are.

It resonates. It integrates.

Beauty, in this sense, becomes a form of understanding.

Beauty isn’t just something we admire. It is doing something to us.

Other research shows that people who are more open to these moments, who notice and engage with beauty, tend to report greater emotional regulation, stronger connection, and a deeper sense of meaning.

The Beauty of Science

And beauty is not limited to art.

Scientists often describe beauty in their work—in elegant equations, in cells under a microscope, in patterns, in the structure of the natural world. These experiences are not incidental. They sustain curiosity, deepen engagement, and often lead to discovery.

What begins as an internal response can extend outward—into connection, collaboration, even a sense of shared purpose.

Designing Beauty Into Everyday Life

There is also growing evidence that beauty can be designed into everyday life.

Environments that incorporate natural light, thoughtful form, and design centered on individual and community human well-being have been shown to improve well-being, attention, and even recovery in healthcare settings.

Hospitals with daylight and art have been shown to shorten recovery times and ease pain. Classrooms painted in natural hues improve attention and cooperation. Tree-lined, human-scale streets increase neighborhood trust. Aesthetics have the power to make people feel and behave better.

Beauty, in this sense, is not an extra.

It is infrastructure quietly shaping attention, emotion, and how we move through the world.

We often treat beauty as something optional—something to seek out when and if time and means allow.

But the research suggests something more fundamental.

Beauty does not simply please us.

It shapes how we pay attention.

It influences how we feel.

It helps create meaning.

And in a world where attention is fragmented, and meaning can feel harder to access, beauty matters.

What happens when beauty becomes something we actively practice—not just something we happen to notice?

This story draws from my recent reporting on the science of beauty—featuring insights from psychologist Simone Schnall, Director of the Cambridge Body, Mind and Behaviour Laboratory, neuroscientist Edward Vessel, sociologist Brandon Vaidyanathan, Director of the Institutional Flourishing Lab, and others studying how beauty shapes the mind, meaning, and human flourishing.

The full essay explores the research, the experiments, and what these discoveries reveal about how beauty reshapes the mind—and the self.

Read the full story → How Beauty Changes the Beholder.

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Luck often seems mysterious — a fortunate break, an unexpected opportunity, a chance encounter that opens a new path.

Across cultures and throughout the ages, humans have tried to conjure it, from four-leaf clovers, lucky coins, and horseshoes, to the numbers seven and eight. Many people live by superstitions. Some baseball players, for example, refuse to step on foul lines. Others swear by rituals, charms, magic, incantations, and habits believed to tip fate in their favor.

St. Patrick’s Day, a holiday long associated with luck and four-leaf clovers, is a good moment to ask:

Can luck actually be cultivated?

In many cases, what appears to be luck from the outside reflects structural advantages: wealth that cushions risk, family connections that open doors, access to elite schools or professional networks, or social biases that give some people more opportunities than others. Those realities often shape who receives chances and who does not.

At the same time, psychologists who study chance and human behavior have found something intriguing: even when those structural factors are acknowledged, people who describe themselves as “lucky” often share certain habits of attention, openness, and persistence that make them more likely to encounter — and recognize — opportunity.

While you may not be able to control your luck fully, research suggests that people can cultivate conditions that make fortunate events more likely.

Here are four patterns scientists have identified.

1. Notice opportunities others overlook

One of the best-known researchers on luck is psychologist Richard Wiseman, author of The Luck Factor. In a well-known experiment, Wiseman asked participants to flip through a newspaper and count the photographs inside.

On the second page was a large message that read: “Stop counting — there are 43 photographs in this newspaper.”

Many participants overlooked the message entirely. But people who described themselves as lucky tended to spot it almost immediately.

Wiseman’s experiments suggested that lucky people are often more attentive to unexpected information in their surroundings. Because they remain open to possibilities, they are more likely to notice opportunities that others miss.

What this means in practice:
Curiosity matters. Paying attention to unusual ideas, observations, and conversations increases the likelihood of encountering useful opportunities.

Read more of the findingshere:

2. Create more opportunities for chance encounters

Another pattern Wiseman observed is that lucky individuals tend to place themselves in situations where unexpected interactions are more likely to occur. They meet new people, explore unfamiliar environments, and engage with ideas outside their usual routines.

An aspect of this is what sociologists describe as the strength of weak ties. Casual acquaintances, rather than close friends, are often the source of new information, opportunities, and introductions.

Increasing the number of environments in which one interacts with new people expands what researchers call chance exposure—the probability of encountering useful ideas or opportunities.

What this means in practice:
Attend events. Join conversations. Explore new intellectual or professional communities. The more environments you engage with, the more opportunities arise.

3. Stay open after setbacks

The behavioral science work of Nobel Prize–winning psychologist Daniel Kahneman showed that humans often construct tidy explanations for events after the fact. In the book Thinking, Fast and Slow, he describes what he calls the narrative fallacy — our tendency to create stories that make outcomes appear inevitable, even when chance played a significant role.

When something succeeds, we often tell ourselves a story about why it was destined to happen. When something fails, we may do the same. But in reality, many outcomes involve far more randomness than our explanations acknowledge.

People who appear lucky often interpret setbacks differently. Rather than seeing disappointments as final, they treat them as temporary events and remain open to future possibilities.

What this means in practice:
Resilience increases exposure to opportunity. Remaining engaged after a setback allows unexpected paths to emerge.

More on Kahneman’s research here.

4. Prepare your mind for serendipity

Researchers who study creativity and discovery have long observed that chance plays a role in major breakthroughs. But chance alone is rarely enough.

Psychologist Dean Keith Simonton, who studies the origins of innovation, has shown that unexpected discoveries often occur when curious individuals encounter unusual results and choose to investigate further. This idea is often expressed in a phrase attributed to Louis Pasteur, the French chemist and microbiologist whose work led to the process now known as pasteurization:

Chance favors the prepared mind.

In other words, the more broadly someone reads, learns, and explores ideas, the more likely they are to recognize unexpected insights when they appear.

What this means in practice:
Curiosity compounds. Exploring new ideas and disciplines increases the likelihood that chance encounters will lead somewhere meaningful.

More on the research here:

Rethinking Luck

Luck will always involve an element of chance. Structural advantages, timing, and circumstance all shape the opportunities people encounter.

But research suggests that attention, curiosity, openness, and persistence can influence how often those opportunities appear — and whether they are recognized when they do.

Cultivating these habits may increase the likelihood of encountering the small, unexpected moments that can change a life for the better.

The science of luck suggests that opportunity may be less random than it appears.

Have you ever experienced an unexpected moment of luck that changed your path?

If you enjoy thoughtful essays on psychology, culture, and the science of living well, consider subscribing to Well Happy Thrive.

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Ah February. The month of Valentine’s Day, when love is celebrated at its most demonstrative — roses, bouquets of balloon hearts, oxytocin-inciting dinners, chocolate that lickably sticks to your fingers, love poems, and grand gestures. But once the decorations disappear, the flowers fade, and daily life resumes, what truly sustains a loving connection over time?

Research in psychology and relationship science suggests that enduring love is less about intensity and more about attention, behavior, and emotional steadiness. Here are three useful insights, grounded in science, that help you sustain nurturing love — after the flowers fade.

1. Savoring Good Moments Together Strengthens Relationships

Couples who intentionally linger on positive experiences report higher satisfaction and greater resilience. This can be as simple as reminiscing about something joyful - a favorite concert, laughing about something that happened years ago, or a passionate experience together. It can be the two of you looking forward to something like an upcoming trip. It can also be as simple as pausing to notice a good moment - be it at a five-star sunset or a perfect instant of everyday magic, standing next to one another at the kitchen sink as a light beam magically glitters across the cabinets. Over time, these small acts help partners build happiness deliberately rather than leaving it to chance.

Research: Joint Savoring in Romantic Relationships

Try this: Recall a favorite shared memory, or plan something small to look forward to.

2. What You Believe About Love Shapes How Long It Lasts

Research suggests that couples who view relationships as something that can grow through effort — rather than something that is simply “meant to be” — tend to maintain satisfaction over time. In a longitudinal study of more than 900 couples followed for two years, those with “growth beliefs” experienced a slower decline in relationship happiness and were more likely to see their bond improve. Experts note that lasting love often involves interdependence, being deeply connected while still maintaining individual autonomy, along with everyday positive emotions such as gratitude, inspiration, and appreciation.

Research: The role of relationship beliefs in predicting levels and changes of relationship satisfaction

Try this: Challenges are inevitable. Treat them as opportunities to strengthen the relationship rather than as signs that something is wrong.

3. Noticing Everyday Attempts to Connect Sustains Closeness

Relationship researcher John Gottman found that thriving couples consistently respond to small, everyday attempts to engage. Perhaps your partner makes a comment in passing, puts their hand on the small of your back, shares an observation, or asks a question while you’re watching TV or riding in the car. Over time, partners who acknowledge these small bids build emotional security and closeness, while those who routinely overlook them may gradually drift apart.

Research: Want to Improve Your Relationship? Start Paying More Attention to Bids

Try this: When your partner reaches out, even casually, pause and respond. Small moments of attention accumulate into lasting connection.

A Final Thought

Romantic love is often portrayed as something that happens to us — a heart pitter-pattering, swooning force of chemistry or fate. Yet research increasingly suggests it is also something we practice. It grows through attention to small joys, deliberate acts of care, acceptance of change, kindness toward ourselves, and efforts to understand one another.

Grand gestures can be memorable and exhilarating, but everyday behaviors are what quietly sustain connection over time. As February gives way, those small choices may be the most meaningful and sustainable expressions of love there are.

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On Thursday, Team USA’s 20-year-old Alysa Liu became the first American woman to win an individual figure skating gold medal since 2002. Her effervescent joy was contagious. With bold, dyed “halo” stripes in her hair, a “smiley” frenulum piercing, and a free skate set to disco-goddess Donna Summer’s MacArthur Park Suite, she seemed to skate on her own terms — fearless, expressive, unmistakably herself.

What made the victory remarkable was not only the performance but the path. Liu stepped away from elite competition in 2022. “Skating takes up your whole life,” she said. “It kind of becomes a blur.” She returned for the 2024–25 season with a different perspective — calmer, freer, less defined by expectation — and described her Olympic performance as feeling “calm, happy, and confident.”

Other Winter Olympics 2026 stories of triumph shine through, including American bobsledder Elana Meyers Taylor, at age 41, capturing historic gold in the women’s monobob and the Team USA Olympic Women’s Hockey Team coming from behind to win gold in overtime.

Yet the Games also illuminate the other side of ambition: A terrifying high-speed crash by Lindsey Vonn on the slopes. Medal favorite Ilia Malinin, shocking the skating world by missing an individual podium finish. He later contributed to Team USA’s gold medal.

The Olympic broadcast, highlighting the immense psychological pressure elite athletes face, and sharing a conversation with multiple gold medalists, Mikaela Shiffrin and Simone Biles, about mental health. Curling controversies, visible frustration, even meltdowns — the full spectrum of human response to striving for number one has been on display.

Vonn made a public statement after her crash:

“Yesterday my Olympic dream did not finish the way I dreamt it would… it wasn’t a storybook ending or a fairy tale — it was just life… Standing in the starting gate yesterday was an incredible feeling that I will never forget… Knowing I stood there having a chance to win was a victory in and of itself… We dream. We love. We jump. And sometimes we fall… the only failure in life is not trying.” - Lindsey Vonn

Each performance lasts minutes. Its emotional resonance can endure for years.

What does it mean to pursue a medal that declares you the best in the world — and what does that pursuit demand in return? Beneath the spectacle lies a deeply human hope: that extraordinary achievement will translate into lasting fulfillment.

Research suggests the relationship between achievement and happiness is far more complex. Large international studies of human flourishing, including the Global Flourishing Study led by Harvard researchers, indicate that long-term well-being depends less on external success than on factors such as purpose, relationships, health, and character. Longitudinal research also suggests that happiness may predict later achievement more than achievement predicts happiness, while decades of work on affective forecasting show that people consistently overestimate how much success will transform their lives.

Achievement can bring tangible advantages. Studies suggest that elite performers — including Nobel laureates, Academy Award winners, and Olympic medalists — often live longer than average, though select sports carry elevated risks.

Over the years, I’ve interviewed a wide range of Olympic champions and elite athletes — including Lindsey Vonn, Allyson Felix, Maria Sharapova, Dara Torres, Natalie Coughlin, Nastia Liukin, and Kristi Yamaguchi. What has struck me most is not simply their drive to win, but how often they speak about what lies beyond the podium — family, purpose, reinvention, the search for balance after years defined by a single goal.

Five-time Olympian Dara Torres told me that what protected her from post-competition depression was having a life larger than sport. By the 2008 Beijing Games, she was a mother, and her priorities had shifted. That perspective did not diminish her competitiveness; it grounded it.

Elite athletes often describe victory as fleeting. The years of preparation — the discipline, monotony, camaraderie, sacrifice — occupy far more of their lives than the moment of triumph itself. When competition ends, a new identity rebuilds - one not organized around training schedules, rankings, or results.

There is also a quieter lesson in the Olympics: the dignity of those who do not win. For every medalist, dozens of competitors leave without hardware but not without meaning. They have pursued something extraordinarily difficult, often for years, knowing the outcome is uncertain and partly beyond their control. That willingness to strive, publicly and imperfectly, is its own form of courage.

Few of us will ever compete on an Olympic stage, but the underlying dynamics are familiar. Many people organize years around a single goal — a promotion, a degree, a business launch, a creative project, a championship season for a child. When the outcome finally arrives, whether triumphant or disappointing, the question of what comes next can feel surprisingly open.

Winning can be exhilarating. It can validate efforts and inspire others. But it is a moment within a much longer story, one that includes setbacks, reinvention, relationships, and the search for purpose beyond performance.

What endures is the person forged in the attempt.

Perhaps the deeper lesson of the Games is not simply how to win, but how to live with intensity, discipline, and hope in the face of uncertainty — to pursue excellence while knowing the outcome is never fully ours to control.

The pursuit of excellence can be meaningful even when victory is uncertain or fleeting. Most of us will never stand on an Olympic podium, yet we recognize the impulse. I am not a professional artist, but I paint and sketch for the discipline and discovery — what emerges on the canvas, and what it reveals about the person holding the brush. I am not a marathon runner, but a three-mile run along the ocean or through tree-lined trails can feel like a small personal triumph. The exhilaration of engagement and showing up fully to something difficult and alive.

There are pursuits where being number one matters deeply to competitors — the medal, the trophy, the recognition of peers, the validation that effort has been seen. For those who feel the odds are stacked against them because of bias, circumstance, or invisibility, and for whom the public recognition perhaps never comes. Then, the reward may need to be internal: the deep knowing that you are indeed excellent.

Athletes sometimes describe being forged by pressure. The outcome may be uncertain, but the transformation is real. Excellence, in this sense, beyond a position on a podium but as a way of moving through the world — showing up on time, keeping promises, practicing when no one is watching, striving toward a standard that is not purely external. Not perfection, but integrity in effort.

How we pursue one goal often echoes across others. The habits of attention, discipline, and courage developed in one arena tend to surface elsewhere — in work, relationships, creative life, even in how we face adversity. Victory may be episodic. Character is cumulative.

Liu’s gold medal will endure in the record books. But the deeper resonance of her story may be the reminder that excellence is not only about domination or endurance. Sometimes it is about returning to a pursuit with joy intact — discovering that freedom, not just force, can produce greatness.

For a deeper exploration of what victory contributes to a good life, and what sustains well-being after major achievements, you can read my earlier feature for Templeton Ideas, “Finishing First: What It Really Means to Win.”

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Cold-weather sports lovers, rejoice. As the Winter Olympics unfold, it’s a natural moment to think about movement — not only at the level of elite athletic performance, but in the more accessible ways winter invites us to move in our own lives.

Years ago, I reported a guide to winter sports for the Los Angeles Times, focused on how Angelenos could safely enjoy snow and ice closer to home. Revisiting that reporting now, what stands out beyond the intensity or calorie burn of select winter sports is the way cold-weather movement can support joy, resilience, and a sense of seasonal care.

Winter play can ask something different of the body. The air is brisk. You sometimes have to acclimate to high altitudes. Balance, awareness, and patience matter as much as strength. ❄️ Whether it’s snowshoeing through a quiet valley, gliding across an ice rink, or pulling a sled uphill only to laugh all the way back down, winter movement reminds us that exercise doesn’t have to be punishing to be meaningful.

For those who don’t ski or snowboard, winter still offers plenty of entry points. Family-friendly activities like snowshoeing, cross-country skiing, sledding, and ice skating allow people of all ages to step into the season — not to optimize performance, but simply to participate.

For the curious: What winter sports ask of the body

For readers who like to know the fuel requirements, here’s how different winter activities compare.

• Cross-country skiing: ~1,000 calories/hour

• Snowshoeing (with poles): ~800 calories/hour

• Alpine skiing: ~600 calories/hour

• Ice skating: ~400 calories/hour

• Sledding: ~200 calories/hour

Numbers aside, some of the benefits of winter movement is often less measurable: fresh air, laughter, awe, and the pleasure of moving with a season rather than rushing past it.

Stay safe: How to prepare for winter movement and sports

Cold-weather sports can be joyful and exhilarating but they’re not risk-free. Physicians and sports-medicine specialists emphasized pacing yourself, staying hydrated at altitude, protecting against the elements, and knowing when to rest. Heading directly off the plane to the slopes, without proper rest or altitude acclimation, with an alcohol stop in between, has caused more than a few accidents.

A heads-up for skiers — likely not a surprise: according to Consumer Product Safety Commission data, the highest share of winter sports–related emergency-room injuries occurs during snow skiing and snowboarding. Toboggans and sleds fall on the lower end of the spectrum.

Fatigue, in particular, remains one of the most common contributors to winter-sports injuries, along with pushing beyond one’s skill level or underestimating changing conditions. No disrespect intended. But you may just not be quite ready for the Triple Black Diamond trails. The goal isn’t fear; it’s fluency. Knowing how to move wisely allows us to stay in the experience longer, with greater confidence and fewer setbacks.

What feels newly resonant now is the broader cultural shift around movement itself. Many of us are rethinking exercise not as punishment or productivity, but as regulation. A way to unplug, steady the nervous system, reconnect with the body and emotions, and experience awe in ordinary places. Cold-weather activities, when approached with care, offer exactly that blend: effort softened by beauty, challenge inside joy.

The Winter Olympics remind us what the human body can do at its limits. They also introduce us to novel sports. Curling — which first delighted me as a kid watching the Olympics — became something I later got to experience, and report on, firsthand. I’ll be sharing more on that soon.

Everyday winter movement reminds us of something else entirely — that being outdoors, moving deliberately, and sharing the season with others can be a form of wellbeing in itself.

Sometimes the most sustaining kind of movement isn’t about burning more.
It’s about belonging to the season, to the body you’re in, and to the beautiful, and sometimes even magical, pleasures winter still has to offer.

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“2026 is the new 2016” went viral across social media — a shorthand for looking back at an era that now feels both closer and more distant than we expected.

In early January, the BBC and other outlets reported that, according to TikTok, searches for “2016” surged by 452 percent in the final week of the year, and more than 55 million videos had been created using the app’s 2016-inspired hazy, blue-purple filter. As of early February 2026, the #2016 hashtag had surged to more than 2.3 million posts on TikTok.

The renewed interest points to something larger than a trend: a collective impulse to revisit a pre-pandemic, pre-AI-everywhere moment — before the full ubiquity of algorithmic feeds, synthetic images, and the growing awareness of just how much online life could be shaped, steered, or manipulated. Posts reminisce about Snapchat filters, Bottle Flip Challenges, the Mannequin Challenge, and Pokémon GO — markers of an internet that felt, to many, messier, looser, and more human.

At the same time, for many people, 2016 represents a far more complicated reality. Even across pop culture, moments of joy and rupture existed side by side — from Spotlight winning the Oscar for Best Picture, to Inside Out winning Best Animated Feature, to Beyoncé’s Lemonade becoming a global sensation — alongside personal, cultural, and political upheavals that shaped lived experience as much as any trend.

Thinking about this moment sent me back to my own reporting from that year, including a 2016 Q&A I wrote for the Los Angeles Times with Zendaya, who was just 19 at the time.

The interview centered on why “fearless” was the best compliment you could pay her. Reading it again now, from the vantage point of 2026, what stands out isn’t just her composure and professionalism at such a young age, but her understanding of fearlessness as something cultivated — not innate, not performative, and not rushed.

She spoke about the importance of voting. About embracing a positive body image. About growth, mistakes, and becoming more fully yourself over time.

The conversation feels newly relevant.

Read my 2016 Los Angeles Times Q&A with Zendaya below.
👉 [LA Times link]

Zendaya explains why ‘fearless’ is the best compliment you can pay her

By Alene Dawson

Zendaya isn’t just a rising star. The 19-year-old doesn’t shy away from speaking up against injustice, including using her social media platform to give voice to the #BlackLivesMatter movement, calling out stereotyping (and needless photo retouching), and challenging her generation to get out and vote.

The actress, singer, entrepreneur, and literal CoverGirl launched into fame as a Disney Channel star, went on to compete on Dancing With the Stars when she was just 16 — emerging as the runner-up — and was preparing to appear in Spider-Man: Homecoming. A champion for embracing a positive body image, she became the face of CHI hair care and inspired a Barbie doll in her image. It’s no surprise Time magazine named her one of The 30 Most Influential Teens of 2015.

Here, she chats with us about being called “fearless” and more:

How did Dancing With the Stars transform your workout routine?

Being on that show really pushed me to do a lot more than what I thought I was capable of, and showed me what real work ethic and hard work look like. It was definitely tough. It was hard on my body, but it was worth it. I learned a lot.

Honestly, I’m a 19-year-old and I have a 19-year-old’s metabolism, so I don’t really have to do a lot of crazy workout stuff. I’m not one of those people who can go to the gym and enjoy it. It’s not my thing. When it comes to working out, it has to be something like dancing — something fun.

You’re known for being a chameleon with your look. How do you keep your hair healthy but still have so much fun with it?

I have a closet full of wigs, clips — all kinds of stuff. I try to keep heat off my hair and find styles, including heatless and protective styles, that I can rock while really learning how to take care of my hair in its natural state. When I do use heat, I’ll use a heat-protecting spray and take all the steps to prevent breakage.

Your book Between U and Me: How to Rock Your Tween Years with Style and Confidence was published in 2013. Now that you’re at the end of your teen years, what advice would you give to your younger teen self — and teens reading this?

I would say, “You will make mistakes.” Everyone is going to try to make all the right choices, and I think everybody in the world tries their best to do the right thing — but sometimes problems or failures are inevitable, and that’s OK. You’re going to grow and you’re going to move past it. Everything moves with time. It’s OK to make mistakes. It’s OK not to be perfect all the time.

You’ve often been described as “fearless.” How can the rest of us get a little bit of that?

It’s really important. It’s not something to be learned overnight — you grow and you get to be more fearless. I don’t think anybody should rush that process. Some people find that fearlessness when they’re younger. Some people find it when they’re older.

What advice do you have for those who struggle to express their truth?

No one likes to live a lie. No one likes to pretend. People can act their way through life, but in the end it feels so much better just to be yourself.

— End of Q&A —

Fearlessness isn’t always about bravado or certainty. Some people seem as though they were born fearless; for many, it’s cultivated over time as a daily practice. Feeling fear is a natural emotion — and as the saying goes, courage is fear that has said its prayers.

What did “fearless” mean to you in 2016 — and what does it mean to you now, in 2026?

👉 LA Times link

Zendaya later shared this interview on Facebook. You can see her post here:
👉 Facebook link

Look for my new vertical, Culture, In Conversation, on Well Happy Thrive. I’m excited to continue growing this community with you. For more stories on the art & science of living well, share and subscribe below.

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The 2026 wellness trends are here — and they’re about more than feeling good. They’re about how we endure.

This week, at the Global Wellness Trends + Media Research Event in New York, the Global Wellness Institute’s newly released forecast signaled a shift in how we define care itself — beyond glow-ups and endless self-optimization, and toward resilience, nervous-system repair, and even disaster readiness.

From glow-ups to grief raves and go-bags.

The Institute’s 2026 Trends Forecast identifies ten major themes:

1. Women Get Their Own Lane in Longevity
Longevity science re-centered on women’s biology and healthspan.

2. The Over-Optimization Backlash
A move away from constant measurement and biohacking toward emotion, embodiment, and meaning.

3. The Rise of Neurowellness
Nervous-system regulation as the next frontier of health.

4. Fragrance Layering
Personalized scent as emotional language and identity.

5. Ready Is the New Well
Disaster preparedness and resilience as wellness practices.

6. The Festivalization of Wellness
Dance, music, ritual, and collective catharsis as forms of care.

7. Skin Longevity Redefines Beauty
A shift from “anti-aging” to long-term biological skin health.

8. Women & Sports: The Revolution Continues
Strength, competition, and capability replacing aesthetic fitness ideals.

9. Tackling Microplastics as a Human Health Issue
Reducing toxic load in bodies as well as environments.

10. Longevity Residences
Preventive medicine and wellness integrated into homes and communities.

Together, these trends tell a clearer story than any single one of them.

Wellness is no longer just about looking better or performing better. It is increasingly about staying intact — emotionally, physically, and socially — in a world that feels harder to trust and harder to predict.

Over my past 20 years of reporting, I have chronicled the rise of the modern wellness movement from niche subculture to a projected $9 trillion global industry.

In recent years, wellness has promised control — from sleep scores and biological age to perfectly calibrated supplements — and now toilets that can analyze stool and bathroom mirrors that show real-time diagnostics, including flagging nutritional deficiencies, preventive alerts, and monitoring that tracks heart rate, oxygen levels, and skin for conditions. Integrated wellness systems connected to wearables can even predict stress — all before you’ve had your morning coffee.

And this is just a small, entry-level example of where biohacking and technology are steering sectors of the wellness industry.

The question is not whether this future is possible, but whether it’s desirable.

Do we want wellness to live in dashboards and alerts?
Or in simpler, older ideas — clean air, sunlight, daily movement, and buildings designed to calm rather than stimulate the nervous system?

One of the strongest currents in this year’s forecast is a backlash against over-optimization. After years of treating the body like a machine to be upgraded, wellness is rediscovering emotion, sensation, and connection.

Dance, music, scent, and ritual are returning as legitimate forms of care — although historically, and in many cultures today, this has long been the case.

What looks like “festivalized wellness” is really collective regulation: movement as medicine, joy as nervous-system repair, even grief finding expression in sound and bodies moving together.

Running beneath many of these trends is a quieter one: a renewed hunger for real human connection.

Speakers at the event noted that, in an age of constant digital mediation, unstructured time with other humans is increasingly seen as a luxury good. What once required no branding — gathering, moving together, sharing space — now competes with screens, schedules, and solitude.

The rise of dance-based wellness, communal rituals, and “festivalized” care suggests that what people are really seeking is not another protocol, but each other. In a world optimized for efficiency, togetherness has become a form of medicine.

Wellness is also absorbing the pressures of a destabilized world.

At the event, disaster preparedness was discussed alongside meditation, healthspan, team sports, and even fragrance layering as a form of self-care. It was framed less as paranoia or panic than as realism: readiness not as something that heightens fear, but as a way to quiet it — a go-bag for the mind as much as the body.

In an era of climate shocks, political upheaval, and constant alertness, preparedness is being framed as peace of mind.

The old spa-weekend fantasy has expanded beyond “how do I glow” to include a harder question: “how do I endure.”

The narrative embedded in the retro Calgon, take me away! bubble-bath commercial has been retooled. Wellness is no longer just about luxury and pampering; it now also includes the ability to escape — sometimes literally.

Follow the money, and another correction emerges.

Investment and attention are finally moving toward the menopausal woman — a body long sidelined by both medicine and culture. Longevity science, diagnostics, and fitness are beginning to recognize that aging does not happen the same way in female bodies, and that menopause is not an afterthought but a major physiological transition worthy of its own research and design.

The product landscape is changing, as is whose health is considered worth optimizing in the first place.

The built environment is part of this shift, too.

Susan Magsamen, executive director of the International Arts + Mind Lab at the Brain Science Institute at Johns Hopkins University, spoke about how design choices — from light and sound to materials and layout — directly shape nervous system health.

Buildings can increase stress or help regulate it.
Healthy personal and communal spaces are not luxuries.
They are deep forms of care.

Many of these ideas — nervous-system regulation, emotional release, community resilience — are not new. I’ve been writing about them for years.

What’s new is the way the wellness industry is finally organizing around them.

For many, technology is a great help to their well-being. But now, it’s also about something more. This year’s trends feel less like a forecast than a confession.

They acknowledge what people already know in their bodies:
Apps aren’t a 24/7 replacement for sunlight.
Devices aren’t a substitute for human belonging.
And algorithms don’t replicate the feeling of safety in a well-designed space.

The future of wellness may not just be about how smart our homes become, but about how they help us feel safe, well, and human.

If you’re interested in how science, culture, and design are reshaping what it means to live well — not just longer, but more fully — I write about it here each week.

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Every January, we are handed the same script.

New year, new you.
New habits. New goals. New versions of ourselves we want to become.

Although most of us act with the best of intentions, there is something both hopeful and exhausting about that story. For many people, it starts to feel like Groundhog Day: resolutions are made with sincerity and then slowly slip away. It frames change as a solo project, a private campaign of discipline and self-improvement, as if we transform by willpower alone. But that is not how human beings actually flourish.

There may be rare exceptions, but for most of us, we do not get well alone. We do not become ourselves alone. And we do not sustain change alone.

Some of the most compelling thinking in wellbeing now points to something both simple and radical. How we are doing is deeply shaped by how we are doing together. Not just me, but us. Our relationships, neighborhoods, shared spaces, and sense of belonging.

The World Health Organization’s 2025 report makes something clear. Social connection - from meaningful friendships to everyday neighborhood ties - is a key determinant of good health. Strong social connections are associated with better health outcomes and lower risk of premature death, while loneliness and isolation are linked to serious physical and mental health harms.

We see the same pattern in research about addiction: Robust support networks, such as family, close friendships, and community ties, act as protective factors against developing substance use disorders. Youth who feel connected to their schools and families have lower rates of misuse. These experiences shape brain development and how we regulate stress, not just behavior. (Watch Johann Hari’s popular TED Talk, “Everything you think you know about addiction is wrong ...”)

We live in a culture that has become exquisitely good at personal optimization. We track our steps, our sleep, our mood, our calories. We meditate. We journal. We download apps designed to make us calmer, happier, and more productive. We even curate our entertainment into separate algorithmic silos inside our own homes.

And yet even the most dedicated self-care routine cannot replace the feeling of being part of something larger. The experience of being seen, needed, and woven into the life around you.

Celebrating a family member’s victory, even when it feels small. A friend who checked in on you at exactly the right moment. The neighbor who shoveled your driveway without being asked. The neighborhood or group that made you feel like you belonged - be it a book club, an exercise class, or friendly grocery store check-out clerk.

The World Happiness Report 2025 finds that people who experience higher levels of trust, kindness, and everyday social connection consistently report greater well-being across cultures. That includes sharing meals, helping others, and feeling supported by the people around them.

And as extreme longevity becomes a growing cultural preoccupation, it is worth remembering that dozens of supplements and endless optimization may not be the most powerful medicine of all. Deep, sustained social bonds can slow biological aging, literally shaping our bodies over time in ways that reflect how connected we are to others.

We talk constantly about what I should do, how I should improve, heal, and grow. But we talk far less about the environments we live in. Whether our streets feel welcoming. Whether our public spaces invite connection. Whether our communities make it easier to care for one another.

Yet these things can matter just as much as what we eat or how often we meditate.

They shape whether we feel safe.
Whether we trust one another.
Whether we have places to gather, to rest, to create, to grieve, and to celebrate.

In other words, they shape whether we can truly thrive.

These ideas have been especially present for me after conversations with Anna Alexandrova, Professor of Philosophy of Science at the University of Cambridge, public policy scholar Mark Fabian, and other scholars who study how communities flourish. They are asking a deceptively simple question. Not just how individuals are doing, but how our shared spaces, institutions, and relationships support or undermine our ability to live well together.

I explored this work more deeply in a story for the John Templeton Foundation, No Man Is an Island: Well-Being as a Collective Endeavor, which looks at how well-being is increasingly understood as something built through trust, beauty, public spaces, and everyday acts of care. If you would like to go deeper into that research, you can find it here.

But even without the data, most of us know this intuitively. We feel better when our world feels kinder. When we have somewhere to go. When someone notices if we do not show up.

So perhaps this year does not need to be only about becoming a newer, shinier version of yourself.

Perhaps it can be about something less lonely and less solitary.

New year, new us.

What would it look like to invest not only in your own well-being, but in the well-being of the places and people around you?

To thank someone who made your life better, no matter how small the moment.
To support a space that brings people together.
To create a little more beauty, safety, or generosity wherever you live.

How we are doing is not defined only by how productive or disciplined we feel. It is shaped by whether we are safely and positively connected to the world we are part of, and whether we are a safe and welcoming place for others to connect as well.

You’re always welcome here. If this resonated, I write each week about the science, culture, and lived experience of what it means to thrive. You can subscribe below to keep reading.

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The Awe-Seeker’s Guide to Travel explores journeys that transform — from glacier hikes to hidden city gardens. Discover how travel sparks wonder, builds connection, and enhances well-being. Each story blends beauty, culture, and the science of awe to help you travel not just farther, but deeper.

For smaller, on-the-ground moments of wonder — exhibitions, festivals, and everyday experiences — see Dispatches.

There are seasons when starting over feels necessary and almost impossible. We want relief from what’s heavy — regrets, complicated histories, versions of ourselves we’ve outgrown — and we want to believe renewal isn’t just poetic language.

We want it to be real.

Psychologists remind us that hope isn’t naïve; it’s intrinsically human.

Psychologist Everett Worthington has spent his career studying forgiveness (including self-forgiveness)and other virtues. He says there are two components of hope:

Will Power: the desire to shape a different future

Way Power: the belief that real pathways exist

When both stay alive, possibility returns.

The New Year can be a wonderful invitation to begin again — but renewal doesn’t belong to January. It can happen any day, any hour, any time you pause, take a breath, and decide to turn gently toward what matters.

Beginning again isn’t magic. It asks for honesty. Sometimes responsibility. Sometimes the courage to face what hurts. It may mean loosening our grip on identities, habits, or even relationships we once believed defined us. But renewal is profoundly generative — it restores dignity, agency, compassion, and the sense that life is not finished with us yet. Worthington reminds us that it matters to hold onto that sense that you can still do something meaningful.

Change is also deeply practical and relational. As counseling psychologist Dr. Jesse Owen notes, our habits are tied to our sense of self and social circles. Renewal often requires support, structure, time, and compassion — especially for ourselves.

Maybe the most liberating truth is this: starting over rarely means becoming someone entirely new. More often, it’s a quieter returning — a gradual re-alignment with your healthiest, truest self.

If you’re standing in a season of questions — What now? Is change still possible for me? — The answer from research, lived experience, and the people who study hope is yes.

Renewal is real.

Pathways exist.

You are not behind.

I explored these ideas in depth with extraordinary thinkers in my Templeton Ideas story Clean Slate: How to Leave the Past Behind and Start Anew. If you could use grounded hope, compassionate guidance, and science-backed encouragement, you can read it here.

Your story isn’t finished.

You’re allowed to begin again.

If this resonates, join us. You’re welcome here. I share thoughtful, science-informed stories about meaning, resilience, awe, and the art of thriving.

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There’s a small kind of thrill in opening the mailbox and finding, amid bills and circulars, a hand-addressed note written just for you.

In a world that moves at the speed of texts and inbox replies, a handwritten thank-you note can feel almost radical: a pause, a choice, a moment of attention.

Years ago, I reported on thank-you notes for the Los Angeles Times. Re-reading the etiquette basics now, what stands out isn’t the old-fashioned formality of the act but the meaning behind it, especially in a world where people are craving connection. A thank-you note is a tiny act of connection that can surprise and brighten someone’s day.

And connection, research suggests, is one of the great sustaining forces in human life.

Why gratitude still matters

Gratitude isn’t just a warm feeling. It’s also a practice that can shape how we cope.

In one classic set of experiments, people assigned to write down what they were grateful for reported benefits tied to subjective well-being — including mood and life appraisal measures — compared with control conditions.

More recently, a 2023 systematic review and meta-analysis examined gratitude interventions (including practices like gratitude journaling and gratitude letters) and found evidence of measurable benefits across outcomes studied in that literature.

A thank-you note is a simple, social form of gratitude practice. It doesn’t require perfection — only sincerity.

The “always correct” rule of thumb (and the modern exceptions)

The Emily Post Institute’s guidance is clear: it’s “always correct” to send a handwritten thank-you, and people appreciate them — especially for gifts.

They also offer a practical rule of thumb: send a written note any time you receive a gift when the giver wasn’t there to be thanked in person. In some close relationships and contexts, a call or email can be acceptable.

In other words, etiquette is less about rigidity and more about care.

What makes a thank-you note work

For the clearest guidance, I’m drawing from etiquette expert Lizzie Post, co-president of the Emily Post Institute and great-great-granddaughter of Emily Post.

Her reminder is beautifully direct:

“There’s something very lovely about the personal, physical touch of someone’s handwriting on an actual piece of paper that arrives at your door,” Lizzie Post says.

A good thank-you note doesn’t need to be long. It opens with warmth. It names the gift or act specifically. And it closes with a small gesture toward connection.

Here’s an anatomy of a “Thank You” note:

Step 1: Start with an opener or greeting: ‘It was so lovely to see you.’

Step 2: Thank them for the specific item given and tell them how you have already used the gift, or plan to: “Thank you for the lovely bowl. It is the perfect fall color for my dining room table, and I can’t wait to enjoy it all season long.”

Step 3: Then, a closing. It’s nice to include a wish for the future, but not obligatory. “I look forward to visiting in the New Year and hope that you enjoy the holidays.”

Two common questions

Do I need to send a gift with my thank-you note?
No. A thank-you note is not a “return gift.” Gift-giving isn’t a guaranteed reciprocal act — it’s an expression of generosity.

Is it ever too late?
No. Better late than unsent remains consistent Emily Post guidance.

A pleasing nudge

If someone gave you something this year — time, help, a meal, a thoughtful message — and you never quite got to the note, this is your permission slip.

Write three sentences. Keep it simple. Let it be imperfect.

Gratitude doesn’t have to be grand. Sometimes, proof that we notice and appreciate one another is as simple as putting ink on paper — even, in the era of smartphones, using a stamp.

Additional Sources

• Emily Post Institute, Complete Guide to Writing Thank-You Notes

• Emmons & McCullough (2003), Counting Blessings Versus Burdens

• 2023 systematic review and meta-analysis of gratitude interventions (PMC/U.S. National Institutes of Health (NIH))

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Sparkle, glow, and the joyful rush of the season — the holidays are here.
It’s a time of soft golden mornings and shimmering, festive nights — kitchens full of warmth, familiar movies playing in the background, ornaments lifted from their boxes like tiny treasures. We gather, we savor, and we think of the people we love, those here, and those we hold in memory.

There are simple rituals: lighting a candle, steeping tea, slipping into a favorite scarf, walking through fresh snow. And then there’s the effervescence — laughter, carols, the bright energy of celebration.

Gifts can do more than delight. They can soothe, spark joy, inspire creativity, and bring us closer to one another. They invite us back to our senses and back to ourselves.

This year’s Well Happy Thrive Holiday Gift Guide is shaped around six intentions: Be Well. Be Joyful. Be Connected. Be Inspired. Be Rested. Be Creative.
Each selection is chosen with care — grounded in thoughtful research, sensory joy, and the kind of beauty that lingers long after the season ends.

Whether you’re gifting someone dear or creating your own winter ritual, may these offerings bring warmth, wonder, and moments of magic to your winter.

BE WELL

Gifts for calm, ritual, self-care, and sensory nourishment.

A Cozy Throw Blanket
(Bearaby Cotton Napper, Lola Weighted Blanket)
Soft, warm, and grounding — the kind of blanket that turns an ordinary evening into a sanctuary.

Saje Natural Wellness Diffuser + Essential Oils
(The Joy Drop Set, Best of Saje Wellness Set)
Aromatherapy as a daily ritual — gentle, restorative, beautifully designed.

A Soothing Hand Balm
(Aesop Shower Room Serenades Gift Set or Aesop Greetings in the Guest Room)
A sensory pause — earthy, aromatic, refined. Something you’ll reach for again and again.

Cozy Socks
(Bombas Fuzzy Socks, Ugg Leda Cozy Socks - also available with sparkles, Le Bon Shoppe Cloud Socks, Hansel from Basel Cashmere Rib Crews)

Soft and comforting — a small gift that feels like being cared for.

A Spa Moment at Home
(Manucurist Super Ultimate Active Manicure Kit)
A little holiday spa — an all-in-one nourishing kit that leaves hands soft, polished, and renewed.

A Big, Oversized, Colorful Scarf
(Acne Studios Mohair Checked Scarf, COS Fringed Brushed-Mohair Scarf, J.Crew Brushed Woven Scarf, and more)
Warmth and joy — a pop of color that brightens even the coldest days.

BE JOYFUL

Gifts that spark delight, play, pleasure & simple joy.

A Gorgeous Box of Chocolates
(Compartés Dubai Chocolate Cups; Koho Chocolates Explorer Blue 12-Piece Assorted Bon Bons)
Decadent, beautiful, and a sensory celebration — joy in edible form.

Preserves, Jelly, or Jam
(As Ever Signature Fruit Spread Gift Set; Bonne Maman 2025 Limited Edition Advent Calendar)
Bright, flavorful, and thoughtfully packaged — a small luxury that turns morning toast into a moment.

A Savory Olive Oil
(Brightland The Duo Gift Set or The Holiday Hosting Gifting Set)
Vibrant and flavorful — a way to bring joy into the kitchen.

Music Subscription
(Apple Music, Spotify, Amazon Music)
A soundtrack for winter — joy, nostalgia, connection.

BE CONNECTED

Gifts that bring people together through laughter, presence, and shared memory.

Ice Skating Passes
Movement, nostalgia, and winter air — a joyful experience for two or more.

Bowling or Arcade Night
Playful connection — a return to simple, spontaneous fun.

Botanical Garden or Conservatory Tickets
Warmth, greenery, and quiet beauty in the heart of winter.

Holiday Light Spectacular
From multi-acre immersive displays like Holiday Road in Calabasas, CA, to a sparkling neighborhood tour — a season that revels in awe and wonder.

Museum, Concert, or Theatre Tickets
A lasting memory — something to look forward to beyond the holidays.

For the Home Cook
(Ooni Pizza Oven)
Because shared meals remain one of the oldest forms of connection.

Road Trip or Scenic Drive
A small adventure — new views, new conversations, new joy.

BE INSPIRED

Gifts that spark awe, imagination, and a deeper way of seeing.

A Book in the Genre They Love
Whether it’s Positive Obsession - The Life and Times of Octavia E. Butler by Susana M. Morris for the Butler devotee, a biography of their favorite musician, The Art Book for museum-lovers, the evocative Batsford Poetry Anthologies Series, a beautifully curated collection of short stories, or a well-crafted life story that sparks perspective, courage, and clarity — a good book becomes a companion, a treasure, a touchstone to return to.

Gift a memoir by someone they admire — an artist, writer, musician, activist, or public figure whose journey invites them to reflect on their own.

Visionary, brilliant, unforgettable — perfect for long winter nights and quiet moments of reflection.

A Museum or Cultural Membership
A year of inspiration — access to exhibitions, lectures, and quiet afternoons wandering through beauty. A gift that deepens curiosity and expands the mind long after the holidays.

A Creative Workshop or Masterclass
From writing and photography to painting, voice, or storytelling — an invitation to learn, explore, and express. A thoughtful gift for anyone seeking growth, creativity, or a new beginning.

A Star Projector
(Astronaut Galaxy Light Projector, LaView Home Planetarium Star Projector, POCOCO Galaxy Star Projector)
Soft, ambient light that turns a room into wonder. A small cosmos for moments of awe.

A Modern Journal or Reflection Book
Space to dream, write, process, and set intentions.
(The Five Minute Journal by Intelligent Change is a terrific option.)

Minimalist Art Kit
Simple, beautiful tools that open the door to creative expression.

BE RESTED

Gifts for restoration, comfort, slow living & exhalation.

A Relaxing Bath Set
Oak Essentials Relaxation Bath Set
Warm water and soft aroma — one of the most restorative winter rituals.

Spa or Massage Gift Certificate
A nudge toward deep rest — one of the most generous gifts you can give.

A Woodsy Candle
(Flamingo Estate Douglas Fir Vetiver Candle, JÓL Holiday Candle)
Clean, evergreen, and quietly atmospheric — winter forest in a jar.

A Tea Lover’s Winter Ritual
Consider the Ember Temperature Control Smart Mug 2; an Art of Tea Subscription for soothing loose-leaf blends delivered monthly; Jade Leaf Ceremonial-Grade Matcha Powder with a Traditional Matcha Starter Set for grounding morning energy; or a beautiful selection from the Rishi Loose Leaf Tea Favorites Gift Set, Tea Forté Warming Joy Tea Chest, or the Bellocq Holiday Collection.
Perfect for winter mornings or slow evenings — an invitation to exhale and savor warmth.

A Silk or Weighted Sleep Mask
(Lunya Washable Silk Sleep Mask; Nodpod Weighted Sleep Mask)
Soft, soothing, and grounding — a gentle invitation to deeper rest and quieter winter nights.

BE CREATIVE

Gifts that invite play, imagination, and creative flow.

A Board Game
Match their personal predilection: Shakespeare lovers may adore The Shakespeare Game; birders: Wingspan; National Park enthusiasts gravitate toward Parks. There’s a delightful world of modern board games for a cozy winter night.

A Modern Puzzle
(Piecework or Le Puzz)
A soothing, visually beautiful activity for slow winter afternoons.

Pottery or Painting Class
Hands-on creativity — tactile joy, self-expression, and the pleasure of making something with your own hands.

A Musical Instrument (Ukulele, Xylophone, or Small Keyboard)
An invitation to play — a ukulele for whimsy, a xylophone for charm, or a small keyboard for budding melodies.

A “Day of Creativity” Gift (your own idea)
A gentle invitation to wander, sketch, write, cook, listen to music, read — whatever sparks joy and opens the door to creative flow.

If something here resonated, I’d love to hear what spoke to you. And if you’d like to support more thoughtful, research-driven storytelling, consider becoming a paid subscriber — it helps sustain this work.

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The holidays can be a joyous time, but there are also pressures, including choosing gifts that resonate with and even delight the recipient. The good news is that the science of generosity offers a simple, beautiful insight: the best gifts aren’t necessarily the most extravagant or clever. They are the gifts attuned to the recipient.

Here are a few research-backed reminders from social scientists — including Elizabeth Dunn, Barry Schwartz, and Sonja Lyubomirsky — on how to choose gifts people actually want, and why giving well feels so good.

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Every November, we return to gratitude as if it belongs to a single holiday — a pause between travel, prepping for the meal, and the swirl of family rituals and obligations. But gratitude is not a performance. It’s a practice. And according to the latest research, it may be one of the most profound and accessible tools we have for resilience, emotional steadiness, and even longevity.

Across psychology, neuroscience, and public health, researchers are finding that gratitude doesn’t simply make us feel good. It reorganizes attention. It regulates emotion. It strengthens memory and deepens connection. It helps us see our lives more clearly — especially in the moments that feel the most uncertain.

Gratitude isn’t an overly precious pause from the world; it’s how we stay grounded in it a day at a time.

I first wrote at length about gratitude for the Los Angeles Times, and the science has since expanded. Here’s what the new research shows — and why gratitude is having a renaissance.

1. Gratitude may help us live longer

A 2024 Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health study found that experiencing gratitude may help older adults live longer. Researchers following more than 49,000 older women found that those with the highest levels of gratitude had a 9% lower risk of all-cause mortality over four years, even after adjusting for mental health, health behaviors, and social factors.

It’s early evidence, but compelling: how we make sense of our lives may influence how long we get to live them.

2. It regulates stress — chemically and emotionally

The University of Rochester Medical Center (2024) notes that focusing on what you’re grateful for is associated with lower cortisol, increases in the feel-good chemicals dopamine and serotonin, and more stable mood regulation.

This aligns with decades of work by researchers, including Northwestern University professor and social psychologist Judith Moskowitz and UNC professor Dr. Barbara Fredrickson, known for her “Broaden-and-Build Theory” of positive emotion, who have shown how gratitude widens our emotional bandwidth and helps us recover more quickly from stress.

3. It meaningfully improves sleep

Research shows that people who regularly practice gratitude tend to sleep longer and more restoratively. Even modest improvements in nightly sleep were linked with better mood, higher life satisfaction, and more prosocial behavior the next day.

When falling asleep, grateful people were found to be less likely “to think negative and worrying thoughts, and more likely to think positive thoughts.”

4. It can interrupt damaging comparison and strengthen attention

Social media can intensify feelings of scarcity and endless comparisons, leaving you feeling like you’re on the short end of someone else’s fabulous life.

Gratitude, however, can shift the attentional lens toward what is already enough and recalibrate the brain’s attentional networks. This helps reduce rumination and makes it easier to disengage from comparison cycles.

Here is a terrific clip about the power of gratitude from Harvard Kennedy School Professor and best-selling author Dr. Arthur Brooks.

5. It deepens connection, the cornerstone of human thriving

The Harvard Study of Adult Development, the world’s longest study of well-being (read more about my interview with study director Dr. Robert Waldinger), continues to emphasize that strong relationships are the greatest predictor of long-term happiness.

Gratitude strengthens those relationships. Indeed, gratitude can help with a wealth of well-being practices, including building trust, increasing empathy, and recognizing the network support that makes life meaningful. Acknowledging even small moments of care strengthens the fabric of a relationship.

6. It protects mental health

For decades, practicing gratitude has been linked to greater well-being, including lower depression, greater optimism, and an increased sense of purpose.

Newer findings support this: gratitude’s influence on stress physiology, mood-related neurotransmitters, and attentional patterns, all of which contribute to emotional resilience.

7. It strengthens identity and meaning

Gratitude reinforces the memory of support — the people, places, and experiences that have shaped us. It offers a more coherent, compassionate sense of self. An important element of well-being, as emphasized by research on emotion and social interaction, positive psychology, human cognition, and by scholars of awe and happinesss, including Dacher Keltner and Yale’s Dr. Laurie Santos of The Happiness Lab.

8. It supports healthier communities

Gratitude has a ripple effect.

When people feel grateful, they tend to act more generously — donating more, volunteering more, and offering emotional support more freely.

Research shows that gratitude predicts stronger community bonds and more prosocial behavior.

9. It helps kids and teens thrive

The benefits of gratitude start early. Young people who practice gratitude experience more positive emotion, healthier friendships, less envy, and greater life satisfaction. These benefits carry into adulthood.

10. Gratitude strengthens agency

Gratitude doesn’t erase hardship but it can offer perspective. It helps us notice what sustains us so we can act from clarity rather than fear — something Kristi Nelson of Grateful.org describes as “It’s really powerful to steep ourselves in what we’re grateful for and then act to defend, protect and advance that in the world.”

✦ The complete guide continues below for paid subscribers.
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The holidays carry an emotional duality: beauty and burnout, connection and loneliness, wonder, and grief. We’re told this is the “hap-happiest season of all,” yet many people move through December feeling stretched, sad, anxious, or quietly overwhelmed. And that emotional tension is far more common than we admit.

Psychologists note that this time of year amplifies whatever we’re already carrying. Seasonal Affective Disorder increases when daylight decreases. Expectations rise. Old family patterns resurface. And yet, this season also offers glimmers of awe, warmth, and meaning that can help steady us.

Here, experts offer science-backed strategies to help you navigate the holidays with greater clarity, connection, and emotional ease.

When Family Dynamics Feel Hard

“It’s helpful to know that you’re not alone,” says Dr. Jonice Webb, psychologist and author of Running on Empty. Her research shows that 40% of people struggle with family gatherings, especially when old roles, unspoken expectations, or painful histories resurface.

Webb offers two grounded strategies:

• Break the “rules” if you need to.

“Before the gathering, think about your own needs,” she says. “If you need to arrive late, leave early, or stay connected to one person you trust, do so — guilt-free.”

• Try connecting with one person differently.

We often pretend everything is fine. “Instead, share something real — a recent struggle or moment of growth,” Webb says. But she’s clear on one boundary: “Avoid politics if you’re not aligned.”

And in some cases?

“If your family makes you miserable, you have every right, and a responsibility to yourself, to skip it.”

If You’re Feeling Lonely

Loneliness is not a moral failing — it’s a signal.

“Feelings of loneliness are your body talking to you,” says Webb. “Your body is telling you that you need to connect with someone for your own well-being.”

This is echoed by 2023 and 2025 Harvard-led studies showing that loneliness behaves like a biological signal, much like hunger, designed to prompt reconnection.

Two evidence-based ways to reconnect:

• Reach out to one person you genuinely like.

“A simple phone call can brighten a day,” Webb notes. Even a five-minute conversation increases oxytocin — the “feel-good hormone.”

• Make a small act of generosity.

“Volunteer,” she says. “Warm feelings of connection and holiday spirit come right back to you.”

Studies show that even brief “micro-connections” — warm interactions with strangers — meaningfully boost well-being.

When Grief Is Present

December and January have the highest rates of loss, and many people quietly grieve during the holidays.

When people have lost family members with whom they feel comfortable and safe, and those positive holiday routines are no longer possible, “there will be distress, and for these people sadness is normal and natural,” says Yale Psychology Professor Dr. Margaret S. Clark.

Her advice:

• Plan new routines.
Not only can they distract from the old routines, but “with time, they can become new traditions,” says Clark.

Grief expert David Kessler adds:

“Let people know, ‘this is a sad holiday for me’ or share that you’re really missing your loved one...When we show up authentically, all of a sudden, what you thought was a bummer becomes a sweet connection. You may find other people miss that person as well...we’ll never know if we keep our grief in the shadows.”

If Gift-Giving Feels Stressful

“Keep your values in check. The holidays are not about money, after all. And they are made great by warm connections with others, not by material gifts,” says Webb.

Grounding reminders:

• Homemade or personal gifts are often the most meaningful
• People remember presence far longer than presents
• Debt doesn’t deepen joy

Studies show that spending money on others, even small amounts, tends to boost happiness more than spending on oneself. Crucially, the benefit is strongest when people feel they chose to give, believed the gift has impact, or strengthened a connection. It’s not the size of the gift but the intention and connection behind it that most powerfully enhances well-being.

Navigating Exhaustion and Stress

“The prevailing mental state for many this time of year is exhaustion,” says Robert A. Emmons, now a Professor Emeritus at UC Davis and founding editor in chief of the Journal of Positive Psychology.

A 2023 APA report found that nearly nine in 10 U.S. adults say something causes them stress during the holiday season, particularly worries about finances, missing loved ones, and anticipating family conflict.

Practical ways to decrease holiday stress include: Stick to a budget; share cooking and hosting responsibilities; utilize time management and prioritize what’s truly important; practice mindfulness and meditation; make time to exercise — it increases endorphins, can lessen depression and increase happy feelings; and don’t have unrealistic expectations of yourself and others.

His guidance mirrors decades of research:

• Prioritize what’s essential and release the rest

• Make time to move your body — exercise boosts mood and reduces stress

• Let go of perfection — store-bought pie is not a moral failure

“And to offset chronic negativity, we need to continually and perpetually hear good news. We need to constantly and regularly create and take in positive experiences,” says Emmons.

“Gratitude is our best weapon, an ally to counter these internal and external threats that rob us of sustainable joy,” says Emmons. There is evidence that grateful people are more resilient to stress in general, whether we are talking minor everyday hassles, major personal upheavals, or simply the stress of holidays.”

Where Awe Fits In (and Why It Helps)

Research from Yale, UC Berkeley, Stanford, and the Greater Good Science Center shows that awe is one of the most stabilizing emotions we have. Even brief moments such as light through a window, choral music, or a winter sky can:

• Reduce stress
• Expand perspective
• Increase connection
• Boost well-being
• Ease rumination
• Strengthen emotional resilience

Recent studies show that awe reduces inflammation, interrupts self-focus and rumination, and expands cognitive perspective — effects observed across cultures and age groups.

Awe doesn’t erase hardship. It widens the frame so hardship doesn’t swallow the whole picture.

During a season that can feel both tender and turbulent, awe acts like a hand on your back, reminding you:

You’re part of something larger. You’re not alone.

A More Compassionate Way to Move Through the Season

You don’t need to force holiday cheer or perform joy, and you don’t need to match anyone else’s version of “merry.” What helps most is honoring what’s true, creating small moments of connection, welcoming beauty where it appears, protecting your energy, letting gratitude steady you, and allowing awe to gently expand your perspective. Presence over perfection.

May you find merry.

May your experience be bright.

If this supported you today, I’d love to hear what resonated.
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An earlier version of this story appeared in Shondaland.

Disclaimer:
This publication is for general informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice, mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for professional medical or therapeutic guidance. Always seek the advice of a qualified healthcare provider with any questions about your physical or emotional well-being. Never disregard or delay professional care because of something you read here.

Fall invites us inward — into slower mornings, candlelit evenings, and the quiet pleasure of watching snow dust the scenery or listening to the calming rhythm of rain. (Rain sounds, research shows, are neurologically linked to relaxation.) These seasonal shifts draw us toward the small rituals that help us feel at home in ourselves again.

Cozy environments can help lower cortisol, increase oxytocin, and support nervous system regulation. Warmth, softness, fragrance, and mindful pauses aren’t indulgences; they’re evidence-based ways to care for emotional and physiological wellbeing.

This season’s Thrive Edit gathers thoughtfully chosen comforts — from weighted blankets to slow rituals — designed to help you drop your shoulders, deepen your breath, and settle into a gentler rhythm.

Warmth & Softness

1. Weighted Blanket

Bearaby Cotton Napper — breathable weight therapy that naturally soothes the nervous system and supports deeper rest.
Also lovely: the ultra-soft Lola Weighted Blanket.

2. Cozy Socks

Small comforts matter — warmth around the feet helps activate the body’s relaxation response — a gentle physiological cue of safety and comfort. Cozy pairs to try:

• Bombas Fuzzy Socks

• Ugg Leda Cozy Socks (also available with sparkles)

• Le Bon Shoppe Cloud Socks

• Hansel from Basel Cashmere Rib Crews

3. Plush Robe

Wrap yourself in softness. The right robe creates an almost ceremonial shift into rest.

• Barefoot Dreams CozyChic Robe

• Brooklinen Super-Plush Robe and Brooklinen Dreamweave Waffle Robe

• Restoration Hardware Luxury Plush Long Robe

4. Plush Warm Slippers

Grounding, warm slippers to keep you cozy from head to toe.

• Ugg Tasman II Slippers

• L.L.Bean Women’s Wicked Good Moccasins

Unlock the full fall cozy guide — tea rituals, analog escapes, and the baked-apples recipe await.

Evening Rituals

5. Aromatherapy Candle

A warm, fall-forward scent can transform any room. These are curated for depth and atmosphere:

• Aesop “Ptolemy” — woodsy, resinous, grounding

• D.S. & DURGA “Big Sur After Rain” — eucalyptus, wet earth, coastal air

• Neom “Cosy Nights” — warm, spicy, deeply comforting from this British wellbeing brand.

Beeswax or coconut wax candles: Fontana Candle Co. (Warm & Cozy Candle Bundle), Natural Sloth (Sweater Season and Cozy), Terralite (White Pumpkin or Bourbon Cedar).

6. Bath Ritual — Mineral Soak

Warm water and magnesium create one of the simplest ways to downshift the nervous system. Beautiful options:

• Oak Essentials Dream Bath Soak

• Naturopathica Sweet Birch and Magnesium Bath Flakes

• Dr Teal’s Epsom Salt Magnesium Soak, Relax & Relief with Eucalyptus & Spearmint

7. Sound Bath Playlist

Ambient soundscapes — like Robot Koch’s The Next Billion Years — can soften the breath, evoke awe, and reduce stress. Ocean waves, rainfall, or thunderstorms also work beautifully. Choose what speaks to your heart and nervous system for evenings, baths, or winding down before bed.

Mindful Moments

8. Tea Ritual

Aromatic tea is mindfulness in disguise. Cozy season favorites:

• Bellocq No. 54, Caravanserai

• Harney & Sons Hot Cinnamon Spice

• Art of Tea Subscription Box — a beautifully curated way to explore new blends all season.

9. The Perfect Mug

East Fork Pottery — Eggshell: soft matte glaze, perfect heft — a modern heirloom.
Prefer heat control? The Ember Mug 2 keeps your drink warm for hours.

10. Analog Escape

Stepping away from screens calms the mind and restores focus. Handwriting is grounding, clarifying, and deeply soothing — a simple ritual with an oversized emotional return. Consider a Moleskine Notebook + Muji Pen.

11. Cozy Puzzle Night

A gentle, analog pleasure that encourages presence and quiet joy. Consider:

• Ordinary Habit

• Piecework

• Crocodile Creek Puzzles for kids and family learning,

Nourishing Comforts

12. Comfort Recipe — Baked Apples with Cinnamon and Honey

Warm, fragrant, and nourishing — the scent alone can shift your whole evening.
If you prefer guidance, the New York Times has a twist on a classic version of baked apples. But baked apples can be as simple as fruit, spice, and heat. Let the aroma fill your kitchen.

Bonus: A Cozy Care Package

If you prefer to gift (or receive) a curated moment, BeyondGiftsCo offers thoughtful options — Hug in a Box, Fall Care Package, and Sending Healing Vibes — complete with blankets, candles, chocolate, and socks ready to go.

Closing Note

Cozy is being present to the soft blanket across your knees, the candle flickering at dusk, the warm mug between your palms. These small rituals remind the body that it’s safe, held, and allowed to rest.

Paid subscribers will receive future Thrive Edits — curated guides to joyful living through beauty, science, and story.

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